Best Man Duties & Responsibilities in Detail | The Ultimate Checklist

Have you been asked to be the best man at your friend or brother’s wedding? Find out what is involved in the role of best man by reading our best man duties guide.

I recently received an email from an avid reader of MR KOACHMAN, who said that he had been chosen as the best man for his friend’s wedding. Being the first time he will be taking up the role of a best man, he asked me for a guide to help him perform his duties well.

I promised him that I was going to publish this guide, so here it is … a helpful list of things to do. And if you are a groom-to-be, share this article with your best man. It will help him get prepped for his role as you plan for the big day!

The best man is the groom’s right-hand man, usually a close friend or close relative of the groom. Have you been asked to be the best man? It is indeed a great honor for the groom to have chosen you, to be by his side on the day he makes the biggest commitment of his life.

We all know that planning a wedding isn’t easy – the groom is already loaded with a lot of responsibilities. It is the responsibility of the best man to lighten this load for the groom by assisting him in completing some of his tasks before, during and after his wedding.

Related: Men’s Wedding Attire Guide | How To Wear A Tuxedo For Your Wedding

What are the best man’s duties? Here is a comprehensive list of 35 responsibilities and duties:

During the Wedding Planning Process

Best Man Duties #1: You are the Team Lead for this Wedding project.

• The best man should be familiar with the wedding plan and activities of that day.
• This is because everyone (including vendors, ushers, servers, the groomsmen, couple’s friends and family members) will look up to you to give them updates on what’s going on, what’s happening next etc.

Best Man Duties #2: Who and Who Are Attending? Get to Know Them and Their Job Functions

• The best man needs to be aware of who all the people who will be assisting in the wedding activities – the ushers, servers, caterers, decorators etc..
• He should have all their contacts and know what duty they’ll have on the day so he can follow up with them and make sure everything is in order and already taken care of before the wedding starts properly.
• He should have all their contacts and know what duty they’ll have on the day so he can follow up with them and make sure everything is in order and already taken care of before the wedding starts properly.

Best Man Duties #3: Will the wedding attire be rented, ready made or bespoke?

• Depending on whether the wedding attire will be rented, bought as ready-made or made as bespoke, the best man should assist the groom in choosing or buying.
• He should also assist in rounding up the groomsmen to select theirs or have their body measurements by a tailor for bespoke suits.

Best Man Duties #4: Are you working with a Wedding Stylist? 

• If yes, ensure you work hand in hand with the groom and the stylist to agree on the budget and other details so you can communicate clearly to the groomsmen in case they want to start contributing financially towards their own outfit.

Best Man Duties #5: Financial contributions. 

• Ideally, the couple should pay for the wedding suits, especially those of the groom and best man. However, if it’s decided that everyone should contribute, agree on the exact figures and discuss this at this planning stage with the groomsmen and be open about it.

Best Man Duties #6: Set up a group chat on a messaging service for proper coordination.

• This will certainly save time instead of organizing frequent face to face meetings. Create a group chat on WhatsApp, Facebook or any other convenient messaging service app. This is so that you will have everyone in one place for easy coordination and discussions.
• You can throw updates on the same group chat as you proceed, plan the bachelor party with those involved and request for whatever information you need from anyone.

Best Man Duties #7: Are you giving the Best Man’s Speech?

• Traditionally, the Best man is required to give the Best Man’s Speech. So if you have been asked to do this it’s a great honor, so make sure you write and practice your speech for excellent delivery on the D-Day.

The Run Up to the Wedding (A few short weeks to the wedding)

Best Man Duties #8: Ensure everyone is ready for the D-day!

• Chat with the groomsmen and ensure they are ready and well prepared for the big day.
• Provide the checklist of things to bring along (for out-of-town groomsmen). This includes their suits, body sprays, deodorants, perfumes, handkerchiefs, belts, shoes and all other accessories.
• You should also share with them the details of any last minute suit fittings too

Best Man Duties #9: Organising the Bachelor Party

• You are the head coordinator and organizer for the bachelor party (the groom’s last big night out before he gets married).
• Have the groom give you insight on the kind of bachelor party he wants and let him provide you with the list of people he would like to attend.
• Then involve other groomsmen to help you with the planning. Also, whatever cost that will be incurred should be split among those who are attending the bash.
• On the day of the party, try not to drink too much. As the organizer, you are responsible for the safety of the groom as well as ensuring that everything is under control. How would you do this if you are inebriated?

Best Man Duties #10: Hotel Reservation

• Help make a hotel reservation for the groom, yourself and out-of-town groomsmen.
• If the groom wants everyone to stay in the same hotel, then arrange accommodation for everyone.

Best Man Duties #11: Rehearsals

• Sometimes this is not necessary for the groomsmen, but, whereby it is, make sure all of the groomsmen are aware of the schedule for rehearsals and that they all show up on time.
• You will all be given instructions on how to enter the room and what to do once the wedding ceremony commences. Listen carefully.

THE DAY BEFORE THE WEDDING

The groom is going to be dealing with last-minute preparations and could be nervous, have this list handy and ensure you take care of everything a day before the wedding.

Best Man Duties #12: Agree on the payments to be made with the groom.

• Sit down with the groom and get him to map out everyone who will need payment on the wedding day, from the officiant of the wedding ceremony to the DJ, the caterer, event decorator, MC, band and any other vendor.
• Once you have this, put exactly the amount meant for each person in a clearly marked envelope so it’s easy to give out that day.

Best Man Duties #13: Are there any rented items? If so, pick them up early!

• Help the bride and groom by picking up any hired items and delivering them where they need to go – this can include the wedding suits.

Best Man Duties #14: Grooming

• Ensure the groom has his haircut and proper grooming.
• Both of you should get to the barber’s shop this morning have a nice haircut and neat shave or proper beard care (if you grow beards).

Also Read: 5 Grooming Essentials Most Men Overlook

Best Man Duties #15: Hotel Stay

• The best man should stay with the groom in the same hotel the night before the wedding.
• Visit the hotel a day before the wedding to confirm that everything is set.
• Make deliveries of what should be in your hotel room a day before such as the groom’s suit, your suit and perhaps the groomsmen suits. Then, toiletries, body sprays, perfume, snacks, water, drinks etc.

Best Man Duties #16: Stay Sober and Do Not Allow The Groom Drink Too Much.

• There’s nothing worse than a drunk groom or best man. Don’t drink too much and also make sure the groom doesn’t get drunk a night before or eat anything that could cause severe stomach upset the next day.

Best Man Duties #17: The Ring: Keep it safe

• Ensure you collect the ring from the groom and keep in a safe place.
• Don’t forget to ask the groom for it and don’t forget to take it with you on the wedding day.

Best Man Duties #18: Go through Your Speech (One last Time):

• Just before you go to bed, go over your speech one more time to make sure you are confident in reading it out when giving your first toast to the couple at the reception.

ON THE WEDDING DAY

Before The Wedding Ceremony:

Best Man Duties #19: Help the groom get dressed.

• You are responsible for dressing the groom the morning of the wedding (if a wedding stylist is not involved).
• Help him fix his tie, his boutonniere etc. and also ensure that all the groomsmen get dressed on time and that everyone is at wedding venue on time (at least 30 minutes before the ceremony is due to start).

Also Read: The Fundamentals of Good Dressing and Sophisticated Style 

Best Man Duties #20: Don’t loose the rings

• Confirm that you have the wedding rings kept safely inside your suit jacket, ready for when the couple comes to exchange rings.

Best Man Duties #21: Confirm the order of Services are out

• Make sure the orders of services are out and call to ensure that the ushers, decorators, and all the workers are at the wedding reception venue that morning doing their job.

Best Man Duties #22: Is there a hired Limo? No … Be the chauffeur

• Drive the groom to the ceremony venue if there is no limo.

Best Man Duties #23: Sit with the groom

• Always be by the groom’s side. This is not the time for you to move around looking for your own bride. Wait till the wedding reception.
• The best man and the groom should go take a seat on the front right-hand side of the ceremony room.

At the Wedding Ceremony

Best Man Duties #24: Give Reading During the Service

• The best man might be asked to give a reading during the service.

Best Man Duties #25: Always Look out for the groom

• Is he sweating? Ensure you dab his face with a clean white handkerchief. Is his tie, boutonniere or lapel flower pin tilted, help him adjust it and ensure it’s properly attached.

Best Man Duties #26: Serve as a witness to the marriage certificate signing.

• Once the bride and groom are married, the best man usually would serve as a witness to the marriage certificate signing.

After the Wedding Ceremony

Best Man Duties #27: Take Care Of final Payments

• Once the wedding ceremony is over, the best man is expected to give the officiant of the ceremony his fee and settle all other vendors.
• If there are any other vendors that would need to be paid such as the DJ, Band, MC etc., you should take care of all these. Give each of them their own share placed in a sealed envelope.

Best Man Duties #28: Escort the Maid of Honor out and help organize the groomsmen for formal photographs.

• The best man is expected to escort the maid of honor down the aisle out of the room when the ceremony concludes.
• He should then assist to round up guests for the wedding photograph according to the list.

At the Wedding Reception

Best Man Duties #29: Mingle at the reception. 

• Mingle at the reception and ensure the guests are well entertained.
• Ensure the workers are doing their job well (enlist the groomsmen and bridesmaids to help).
• If the guests are not well taken care of at the wedding reception, it is entirely your fault. Remember – you are the team lead.

Best Man Duties #30: Stay sober throughout the reception

• Resist the urge to get drunk in free champagne and cognac; you need to be sober and coherent to do your duties.

Best Man Duties #31: Look after the groom

• Make sure the couple eats when they need to and that they drink (moderately) as well. Make sure the groom’s outfit is still on point, and he is not looking disorganized at any point.

Best Man Duties #32: Kick off the toasting with the best man speech.

• This is your biggest duty, but by now you should have been fully prepared to offer the first toast to the couple at the reception and give your speech.
• Relax and speak from your heart. Also, keep the speech short, no one wants a long speech.
• Lastly, remember to toast to the couple, not just the groom.

Best Man Duties #33: Receive the gifts

• At some point during the reception, the guests would usually line up to present gifts and envelopes to the newlyweds.
• The best man is expected to stand in to greet and welcome the guests and collect the gifts on behalf of the couple.
• Also, make an arrangement with the groom where he wants the gifts dropped off and take care of that.

Best Man Duties #34: Have the couple’s getaway car ready

• Ensure the car that will convey the couple back to the wedding-night hotel is ready and decorated (if necessary).
• You might be required to drive the newlyweds to the hotel (if there is no limo). If this is your responsibility, remember that you’ll need to stay sober throughout the reception. In case you won’t be the one to do this, you are then free to enjoy the wedding party and celebrate with your friends!

AFTER THE WEDDING

Best Man Duties #35: Your Last Official job for the wedding !!!

• One last thing you are required to do after the wedding is to ensure that all the rented items are returned the next day (or next working day) after the wedding and that any pending bills are settled.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Best man duties may vary depending on the culture or religion, however, you should use this is a basic outline of what you are expected to do. In summary, your duty is simply to ensure that the groom is not overstressed before and during his wedding. You do this by communicating frequently with the groom so he will let you know what he needs so you will be able to provide all the support you can.

If you need a Wedding Stylist for your wedding, don’t hesitate to contact us using the CONTACT FORM or simply send an email to services@kobikoachman.com with the subject “Wedding Styling Service”.

Also, stay updated on the go with MR KOACHMAN. Click here to sign up for notification and get our free Style e-Book. Follow us our Instagram account today for a weekly dose of awesome fashion + style tips, classic men’s lifestyle and style inspirations.

I wish you the best day ever.

Yours in Style,

Kobi O. Mbagwu (Mr. Kobi)
Founder, MrKoachman.com
Connect with me

On Instagram |  Twitter | Linkedin | Pinterest | Youtube

Follow my blog with Bloglovin >>>

The following two tabs change content below.

• Bio
• Latest Posts

Mr. Kobi

My name is Kobi O. Mbagwu, a professional image consultant, menswear style expert, and entrepreneur who uses fashion, style and clothing as key tools in transforming ordinary men into extraordinary classy gentlemen. My personal goal is to help gentlemen dress better, live well, do well and develop a unique personal style that matches their lifestyle and goals. I believe that success can be built through style. I believe that fashion is a tool that can be used to change people’s lives positively. I also strongly believe that if you dress well, you look good, and if you look good, you feel good and when you feel good, you worry less, and the less you worry the more you are able to stay motivated and focused on your goals pursuit and by so doing you are able to live a more fulfilling and successful life.

Latest posts by Mr. Kobi (see all)

• 35 ESSENTIAL MEN’S STYLE TIMELESS QUOTES TO LIVE BY - March 30, 2024
• 7 Little Tips On How To Be The Center Of Attraction - June 20, 2023
• How To Comport Yourself During First-time Meetings - April 1, 2023